ourselves, a little more alone April 3, 2008
This morning when I checked my e-mail, I got the shocking news that Ashley Morris died yesterday. I met Ashley through blogging, when he was one of the first people to start leaving comments for me. He was very encouraging and welcoming, as he was with all New Orleans bloggers. He was eager to read every word that anyone had to say about New Orleans. Ashley was devoted to New Orleans. He bought a house here right before Katrina, and while we were all bugging out, he was bugging in.
When you meet people online, you form an image of what they are like that sometimes turns out to be comically incorrect. For instance, I pictured Adrastos as a swarthy Greek guy who hung around in bars all day. Well, if you’ve met him, you know he is very light-complected. I knew what Ashley looked like, but I expected to meet an angry human volcano in person. He turned out to have a soft, friendly voice and an affectionate manner. Later, I met Hana and their three children, Katerina, Anabel, and Rey d’Orleans. He was crazy about his family.
It seems inappropriate, but I am actually laughing a little bit while writing this, because, let’s face it, Ashley could be funny as hell. During last year’s Rising Tide blogger conference, Ashley provided sound for the panels and lunch from Dunbar’s. He had just had a vasectomy the day before. He was hopped up on pain killers, holding an ice pack over his groin, and furious that we wouldn’t let him do more.
The very first time I met him in person, he told me the incredible story of his family. He said, “I had a Jack Nicholson childhood.” The story, which he wrote about on his blog, was that he had grown up with a “sister” who turned out to be his mother. His “parents” were really his grandparents. He didn’t find out any of this until after his “parents” were dead. He had no idea who his real father was. This is, of course, not funny, but when Ashley thought someone was engaging in too much self-pity, he was given to saying, “fuck you. My entire family lied to me my whole life about who my parents are, and they died without ever telling me, and I never even got to tell them to fuck off!” This had the effect of making the self-pitying person, Ashley, and any onlookers dissolve into howling laughter at the absurd unfairness of life.
Ashley loved his friends and went way out of his way for people he liked. One day, he e-mailed me that he had a friend he thought I should meet. The friend was B, and we’ve been dating since October. We’ll be thinking about you, Ashley, and we miss you already.
- Posted in : main, new orleans
- Author : dangerblond
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[...] donate to the fund that’s been established to support his family. I like Dangerblond’s story about Ashley: The very first time I met him in person, he told me the incredible story of his [...]
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